Sayonara Seniors 

The final stretch. The last semester and the last quarter. During this last long trek, there is a light at the end of the tunnel that can’t approach soon enough. While allergies claim the noses and lungs of many, the widespread phenomenon Senioritis claims the GPA of students. With seniors only having just over two months left in their high school careers, glazed eyes and unfinished homework are the new normal. However, Senioritis doesn’t affect just seniors. Teachers and students of every grade are basking in the spring sunlight and counting down the days until freedom.  

“I have honestly given up. My college doesn’t require an end of year transcript so homework is no longer my problem and I am living my best life,” Free Sally ‘20 said. “As soon as my ACT was submitted and I accepted my college, I burned every old worksheet and notes as a pre-summer bonfire.” 

Teachers and faculty are also feeling the effects of Senioritis, counting down the days until they can get reprise from their jobs. 

“Working with high schoolers is great until it’s not,” school counselor Hall Monitor said. “I have told so many students over these past few weeks to stay on top of their grades but at this point even I have given up trying to get students to stay on top of their work. Heck, I can’t even stay on top of my own work anymore either.”

While there are some who are able to resist the urge to give into the abyss of Senioritis, its siren call is present and parents are taking measures to convince their children to stay strong.

“My parents had to start bribing me with Chick Fil A and ten dollar bills,” said Needah Nuget ‘21. “I let my grades drop pretty low but Chick is life and I’m willing to work for those nuggets and those dollar bills. Last week I got an A on my math test and I was able to get an eight count meal with a large milkshake and even an ice cream cone. It was fantastic.”

Douglas County School District recently ran a statistical test to see how many kids on average let their grades drop during the last semester before summer. While Coronavirus affects about 3.4% of the population, an astounding 89% of students saw a drop in their grades from their first semester. 

“It’s crazy to me that this happens,” Douglas County board member Hardon Studens. “I know Summer is right around the corner but I don’t think that’s a good excuse.”

As students count the days until summer, percentages are also counted to see how little studying is necessary to get the grade. With such little time until summer, students and teachers alike have mentally checked out and some believe there is nothing that can be done. 

“I am so close to being done that I just laugh at my grades now.” Donne Caring ‘20 said. “I have a midterm this Friday that I’m not studying for, and I currently have four C’s, one B and one D, but hey, that’s enough for me to walk at graduation and that’s all that matters.”